Polyamory WeeklyAuthor: Minx
20 Feb 2019

Polyamory Weekly

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Tales from the front of responsible non-monogamy from a pansexual, kink-friendly point of view. For the full PW blog, visit www.polyweekly.com

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    567 Do families have to live together

    Do families have to live together? My partners and I agreed to live together and have kids, but now I'm not so sure.

    0:00 Introduction and host chat

    Under 18? Stop listening now and visit http://www.scarleteen.com

    1:15 Host chat

    5:45 Poly in the news

    Is there such a thing as poly-dar? Do poly folks have certain recognizable traits?

    8:00 Topic: Do families need to live together?

    Lewis has a male partner and a woman partner, Sally, and the three of them have discussed living together as a family and fathering kids with Sally. However, Lewis says their communication has not been great and their relationship was pretty dysfunctional until recently. He also values his own space and privacy. Is it OK to father kids if you don’t intend to live together as a family?

    • Good instinct to get counseling when the relationship isn’t already pretty healthy
    • You decide what’s good for you, not what’s good for anyone else

    17:30 Feedback

    A listener calls in to ask how to find poly folks rural Pennsylvania.

    22:45 Happy Poly Moment

    • Danielle shares a snow day happy poly moment.
    • Lusty Guy shares a surprise happy poly moment!

    25:30 Thank you

    Thanks to Shelly for the donation, and welcome Laurel and Terra to the Poly Weekly Playmates!

    32:00 How to make this podcast better

    Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com and attach an audio comment or call the listener comment line at 802-505-POLY. If you want us to teach a class at your event, want us to coach you, or want to appear on the podcast, email lustyguy@polyweekly.com.

    Friend us on Twitter or Facebook, leave a comment here. Check out Poly Weekly podcasts at polyweekly.libsyn.com. Share this with a friend or write a review on Apple Podcasts!  Our intro and outro music is courtesy of Pacemaker Jane, “Good Suspicions.”


  • Posted on 17 Feb 2019

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    566 Toxic masculinity

    Kevin Patterson, Chris Smith, Lusty Guy, and Minx discuss what we mean by "toxic masculinity" and how we should respond to both the term and the thing itself.

    0:00 Introduction and host chat

    Under 18? Stop listening now and visit http://www.scarleteen.com

    1:15 Host chat

    1:30 Topic: Toxic masculinity

    Kevin Patterson, creator of the Poly Role Models blog and author of Love’s Not Color Blind and For Hire: Operator, Chris Smith, a doctoral student at Howard University, author of Open to Love: Polyamory and the Black American and relationship researcher, and Lusty Guy, our cohost and producer.

    What is toxic masculinity? Setting absolutes on how gender can present and act. What makes it toxic? Anything in too great a quantity can be toxic. How toxic masculinity really relates to sports: if emotions are so key to teamwork, how can masculinity?

    What do we want “masculine” to be? It’s not inherent. Why is there a negative reaction to the idea of “toxic masculinity,” as in any other instance where too much of something is toxic? First response should be to do a self-assessment.

    How does this relate to polyamory? We need to beware of harem fantasies driving all the media representation of polyamory and of societal scripts of jealousy meaning love and other men being enemies. Everyone’s a little bit toxic.

    Find Kevin Patterson on email at PolyRoleModels@gmail.com, online at PolyRoleModels.tumblr.com, on Twitter at @PolyRoleModels, on facebook.com/PolyRoleModels. Oon Instagram at @PolyRoleModels, and his new fiction work For Hire: Operator is on facebook.com/ForHIreMag or on the web here: tinyurl.com/ForHireMag1 We talked with Kevin and Alana about this new work on episode 563 and about Love’s Not Color Blind: Race and Representation in Polyamory and Other Alternative Communities on episode 545.

    Chris Smith in on Instagram at @SmithChristopherN or via email at Tenabilitymovement@gmail.com. We talked with Chris about Poly and the Black American on episode 528.

    32:00 How to make this podcast better

    Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com and attach an audio comment or call the listener comment line at 802-505-POLY. If you want us to teach a class at your event, want us to coach you, or want to appear on the podcast, email lustyguy@polyweekly.com.

    Friend us on Twitter or Facebook, leave a comment here. Check out Poly Weekly podcasts at polyweekly.libsyn.com. Share this with a friend or write a review on Apple Podcasts!  Our intro and outro music is courtesy of Pacemaker Jane, “Good Suspicions.”

     


  • Posted on 17 Dec 2018

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    565 Help! I'm polysaturated!

    What do you do when your long-distance partners move into town, and you find yourself with too many partners and too little time?

    0:00 Introduction and host chat

    Under 18? Stop listening now and visit http://www.scarleteen.com

    1:15 Poly in the news

    What is polyamory? This is what it’s really like to have multiple partners. Heath Schechinger is one of the leaders of the new Consensual Non-Monogamy Task Force within the American Psychological Association. They're getting stuff done to advance professional understanding of us and our needs.

    2:30 Topic: Help! I’m polysaturated!

    Paul writes in as a relative poly newbie who finds himself with more local partners than he can manage. We advise that it’s OK (and in fact, usually required!) to take time for yourself and love yourself first, figure out how you would ideally spend your time (putting your own needs first), and then share that information with your partners to see if that meets their needs and let them decide if they can live with that.  

    12:45 Happy poly moment

    • Heath Schechinger writes in to share a happy poly moment about bringing up relationship orientation as part of the intake process at his clinic.
    • Jim shares a fun story about his teenage son feeling comfortable enough to ask for personal lubricant—and to ask for his mom’s boyfriend to come by (and no, those two things aren’t related!)

    16:30 Thank  you!

    Welcome Abraham, Jim, and Eric as our newest Poly Weekly Playmates!

    16:45 How to make this podcast better

    Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com and attach an audio comment or call the listener comment line at 802-505-POLY. If you want us to teach a class at your event, want us to coach you, or want to appear on the podcast, email lustyguy@polyweekly.com.

    Friend us on Twitter or Facebook, leave a comment here. Check out Poly Weekly podcasts at polyweekly.libsyn.com. Share this with a friend or write a review on Apple Podcasts!  Our intro and outro music is courtesy of Pacemaker Jane, “Good Suspicions.”


  • Posted on 13 Nov 2018

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    564 Poly-friendly parentage law

    Lawyer Melissa Hall shares exciting news about the new parentage act being enacted in Washington state and hopefully, beyond.

    0:00 Introduction and host chat

    Under 18? Stop listening now and visit http://www.scarleteen.com

    1:00 Host chat and announcements

    Let’s talk about the new Netflix show, Wanderlust. **SPOILERS FROM 4:30-9:30**

    9:30 Poly in the news

    Teen Vogue hits it out of the park again.

    10:30 Interview: Melissa Hall on new, poly-friendly parentage laws in the U.S.

    Melissa Hall shares updates to parentage laws in Washington state and adoptable throughout the U.S. The Parentage Act makes possible third-parent adoptions and establishes rules for de facto parentage. This enables third- (or fourth!)-parent adoptions. “Uniform law” means they’ll push to enact in all 50 states.

    New definitions of de facto parenting mean that the court can recognize people as parents when both the adult and kid see the kid as a parent, even if they aren’t a legal parent. Find Melissa on Twitter at @vrimj, online at www.Smol-law.com or via email at Melissa@smollaw.com.

    24:15 Feedback

    Alana writes in about episode 560 Poly and pregnant, saying that they had to revert to monogamy during her pregnancy due to hormones, stress, and the insecurities that surfaced.

    26:15 Happy poly moment

    Louise in the U.K. writes in to share a story of going from being lonely and polyunsaturated to being in the middle of a long squiggly polycule and full of NRE.

    28:15 How to make this podcast better

    Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com and attach an audio comment or call the listener comment line at 802-505-POLY. If you want us to teach a class at your event, want us to coach you, or want to appear on the podcast, email lustyguy@polyweekly.com.

    Friend us on Twitter or Facebook, leave a comment here. Check out Poly Weekly podcasts at polyweekly.libsyn.com. Share this with a friend or write a review on Apple Podcasts!  Our intro and outro music is courtesy of Pacemaker Jane, “Good Suspicions.”


  • Posted on 05 Nov 2018

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    563 A queer, poly superhero novel centering people of color? Yes, please!

    Kevin Patterson and Alana Phelan have come out with a new superhero novel in which queerness, polyamory, and people of color are normalized.

    0:00 Introduction and host chat

    Under 18? Stop listening now and visit http://www.scarleteen.com

    1:00 Host chat and announcements

    Poly Big Fun, an annual workshop and retreat for people who identify as polyamorous, will take place virtually on November 10th, 2018. Franklin Veaux will be presenting “My abuser is Woke: Recognizing abuse when an abuser is skilled in the language of social justice.” Joreth Innkeeper will be presenting “Breaking up in the poly community.” Visit www.polybigfun.com to register and find out more.

    3:00 Interview: a poly superhero fiction work

    Kevin Patterson and Alana Phelan give us a taste of their new book, a superhero novel in centered on queer, poly people of color. Finally, a love triangle in which the existence of the triangle isn’t the source of conflict! In this world, “operators” are the dirtier, heroes-for-hire in a world where law-abiding superheroes get all the press. What happens when a superhero and an operator are in a relationship?

    Release is October 12, 2018 on Amazon; release party is October 24 at 6:00 in Philadelphia at Amalgam Comics and Coffee House. Alana is The Polyamorous Librarian online, on Facebook, and Patreon. Find Kevin as Poly Role Models on Tumblr, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Patreon.

    Follow For Hire on Facebook and Twitter.

    27:30 Thanks

    Thanks to Miryam for becoming our latest PW Playmate!

    27:45 How to make this podcast better

    Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com and attach an audio comment or call the listener comment line at 802-505-POLY. If you want us to teach a class at your event, want us to coach you, or want to appear on the podcast, email lustyguy@polyweekly.com.

    Friend us on Twitter or Facebook, leave a comment here. Check out Poly Weekly podcasts at polyweekly.libsyn.com. Share this with a friend or write a review on Apple Podcasts!  Our intro and outro music is courtesy of Pacemaker Jane, “Good Suspicions.”


  • Posted on 15 Oct 2018

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